By Bill Hamilton
Part 5 of a series on marriage issues. Chuck and Emma are off to a relative's wedding. Will harmony prevail?
(Lights up to an empty set. Emma enters stage right carrying a suitcase and places it in the middle of the set and exits. Chuck enters stage left.)
Chuck: Okay Emma, car is all packed and ready to go. (notices the suitcase) Another one? (takes suitcase and exits stage left) How many suitcases you taking Emma? . We’re only going be gone a week.
(Bill enters stage left as Chuck exits. As Bill is speaking, Emma enters carrying another one and places it in the middle of the set as Bill is talking. Emma exits then Chuck re-enters.)
Bill: So this is it. The final week of our reality series with Chuck and Emma. We’ve got a second or two while they finish packing up the car, so let’s do a quick review of the issues we’ve watched the young couple deal with over the last month. (holds up the worship guide with the 5 topics listed on the cover and reads them). Having a spouse centric marriage, conflict, communication, finances and finally this week we’ll be exploring hominy.
(If Chuck and Emma are not done with the suitcase thing, Bill continues until Emma reappears with the suitcase. She exits the stage after placing the suitcase down.)
Chuck: Okay Emma, that last one was a challenge but I got it wedged in pretty tight. It should be okay as long as there was nothing breakable in it. (notices the suitcase) You have got to be kidding. Emma!
Emma: (Entering) Chuck, you got the car packed up yet? We’ve got a long drive ahead of us.
Chuck: This one is staying home. There’s no room.
Emma: Fine with me.
Chuck: It is?
Emma: Yeah, this one has all your stuff in it. (pause) I hope you were careful with that last suitcase, I put the wedding gift in there.
Chuck: Of course I was careful.
Bil:l Freeze the scene. Looking back perhaps we should have done a week on truthfulness. (steps back and then realizes he didn’t unfreeze the scene) Oh, uh, sorry. Unfreeze the scene.
Chuck: So how many marriages does this make for your cousin Claudia anyway?
Emma: It’s both her and Edward’s second.
Chuck: So is this Edward guy okay with Claudia and the two girls moving in?
Emma: Sure, why not? Besides, he’s got a son and a daughter at home, too. They’ll be doubling the size of your family overnight. Can you imagine?
Chuck: I’m sure it’ll be no problem. We did it.
Chuck: Mr. Snookums and Tillman?
Emma: You’re comparing my precious dog Tillman to your cat? Please. Tillman is part of the family.
Chuck: So what do you think Mr. Snookums is?
Emma: A cat.
Chuck: At least Mr. Snookums doesn’t drool all over the furniture.
Emma: No, he covers it in fur balls.
Bill: Freeze the scene. We’re going to skip ahead here because if we continue down this dog vs. cat path, this’ll quickly return to conflict resolution. But do you see what happening here? Chuck and Emma each brought something dear to them into this marriage that the other may not love as much as they do, if at all. But look, they’re only talking dogs and cats. I mean, forgive me animal lovers, but that’s nothing compared to a situation like Claudia and Edward where the marriage brings other people together into one household. It’s not easy for a couple in love to suddenly blend their lives together, but it can be even more difficult when other lives are involved. It’s not impossible, of course, but it takes a special quality. It takes … the word it takes escapes me for the moment. (Pause) So in the meantime, let’s get back to our reality series with this week’s topic which is Hominy. (Takes book out and reads)
(Chuck and Emma unfreeze, and stand, one on each side of Bill and listen to what He is reading and somewhere in the reading they interrupt.)
Bill: (reading) Hominy, a noun, is a hulled and dried kernal of corn from which the bran and germ have been removed. As many of you know, hominy, posole, and pozole are all the same food - corn that has had the outer hull removed by a special process, then air dried. Some of our corn for hominy comes from Southwest United States and some…
Chuck: Uh, pardon me.
Bill: Hey, you’re supposed to be frozen.
Emma: What are you doing?
Bill: I’m trying to do a drama.
Chuck: A drama about Hominy?
Bill: Yeah, kind of weird I admit, but I do what I’m told.
Emma (Points to the word and slowly enunciates each syllable) Harmony.
Chuck: Harmony….H A R M O N Y
Emma: Not hominy.
Bill: Oh. Well now, that makes a lot more sense doesn’t it?
(Disgusted, Chuck grabs suitcase and he and Emma begin to exit.)
Bill: Where you going? We’ve got to finish the drama.
Chuck: Oh, it’s finished.
Emma: And one other thing….
Chuck: FREEZE THE SCENE!
(Bill freezes. Chuck and Sue high five!
Emma: I hated when he did that to us.
Chuck: No kidding. So who is that guy anyway.
Emma: I don’t know but we’re definitely going to invest in a security system when we get back home.
© Bill Hamilton, all rights reserved. The script may not be reproduced, translated or copied in any medium, including books, CDs and on the Internet, without written permission of the author.
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