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Summary: A humorous drama based on an old country song, “I am my own grandpaw”. Keywords: Relationships, kin, generations.
Style:  Lighthearted.  Duration: 5min
Actors: 2M (or 1M, 1F)

Script

(SKIT OPENS UP WITH BOTH ON STAGE, ONE MAN ON CELL PHONE)

MAN 1: “So your brother and his wife are staying with us. (pause) For How Long!!!  
          (pause) O.K., great, you owe me one. Love, you, bye. (looks at man 2 and says)
       My family, they are a bunch of nuts.
 
MAN 2:  Ya, I know all about that.

MAN 1:  Can’t be worse than mine.

MAN 2:  Sure,(disbelieving), o.k..

MAN 1: Oh really, go ahead and tell me about yours.

MAN 2: No, that’s all right.

MAN 1: Go ahead, I insist.

MAN 2: Sure, I married this widowed woman who had a grown up daughter. At the
       wedding, my dad, a widower, and my new stepdaughter really hit it off.
        So they eventually got married, so that made my father my son-in-law
        And my stepdaughter is my stepmother because she is my father’s wife.

MAN 1:  What!!

MAN 2:  Wait, it gets weirder. My wife, my father’s mother-in-law, and I had a son.
         Which makes my son my father’s brother-in-law and makes my son my
        uncle. He’s my uncle because he is my stepdaughter’s brother and of course
        that makes my son brother to my stepmother.

MAN 1:  That’s insane.

MAN 2:  Oh, it gets worse. My father and his wife had a son. That makes him my brother, being son of my father. Since, I’m stepfather to my stepdaughter, her son is my
        grandson. So. My brother is my grandson and my wife is my mother’s mother.
        Which makes my wife my grandmother and if my wife is my grandmother then
        I’m her grandchild. Which is a thought that could drive you wild. And as
        husband of my grandmother, (pause), I’M MY OWN GRANDPA!!           
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© Copyright Mike Petrin, all rights reserved. The script may not be reproduced, translated or copied in any medium, including books, CDs and on the Internet, without written permission of the author.
This play may be performed free of charge, on the condition that copies are not sold for profit in any medium, nor any entrance fee charged. In exchange for free performance, the author would appreciate being notified of when and for what purpose the play is performed. He may be contacted at: This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.