Style: Light-hearted. Duration: 12min
Actors: 3M, 3+C
(3 Magi enter, exhausted – collapse into 3 armchairs on stage left. Make all the appropriate noises.)
C: Ah, it’s good to be home!
B: I concur, my good Caspar, I concur.
M: No place like home! Great to hear the sound of the water in the fountains.
B: Ah! Those fountains! What a sight for sore eyes!
C: Yes, and there’s nothing like my favourite armchair.
B: You know, I’ve missed the birds – to wake up to a peacock. Oh! How good is this? Come on, Melchior, come and sit down. A cup of chai is coming.
M: I’m a coffee man, myself … a nice strong Arabica.
C: Fatima is bringing everything. The nephews and nieces are helping.
B: What a wonderful home-coming!
M: Tomorrow, or maybe the next day, I’m going to have a good prowl around – visit all my favourite places
B: I’m sure – ah, here they come.
Fatima: [enters with chai, coffee] Well, here’s everything – your favorite chai, Caspar, and I’ve remembered that you’re a coffee man, Melchior.
C: Ah! Wonderful! This is what I’ve been waiting for. Balthazar – here, have some fresh chai, my good man!
(Child X; Child Y and Child Z enter. They hand round sugar and camel’s milk etc)
C: Hello, is that really you, [use name of child X], - my, how you’ve grown.
B: Goodness – I would hardly have recognized any of you! You’ve all shot up like sunflowers!
X: Have you brought us any PRESENTS Uncle Caspar?
C: What? Presents? Oh. I’d forgotten! But, as it happens … I think I have something in my camel bags for each of you.
X: What are they?
Y: Can we see them?
Z: Where did you get them?
C: Well – I can’t quite remember now – it’s all a bit of a blur. Give us a day or two, kids – you know what it’s like when you’re back from a hectic holiday.
Y: What?! You can’t remember?
C: It was all a bit of a rush getting back, you understand.
Y: You mean you’ve forgotten what you went away for?
B: Yes, we met so many people – all a bit of a blur now.
Z: Come on, Uncle! Surely you remember the STAR!?
B: [vaguely] Star? …. OH YES! THE STAR! We ALL saw it, didn’t we? Before we left? Was it that long ago?
XYZ: yes! Yes! Surely you haven’t forgotten THE STAR!
M: Of COURSE we haven’t – just a bit tired and shagged out following a prolonged walk! – And talking of shaggy – that reminds me of the shepherds.
X: Shepherds? What are shepherds?
M: They’re like goatherds – just . . . shaggier. We met them the night the star stopped. It was HUGE by that time! Brighter than we’d ever seen it before.
Y: So you really DID follow a star?
M: Oh yes! And it took us all the way to a little town called … um – It’s … a bit hazy now.
Z: What? Is that the name of the town? – “A Bit Hazy!” What a strange name!
C: Oh, Melchior, you’re getting as bad as us old duffers. It was called Bethlehem…means “House of Bread”, remember? That’s why we remembered it’s called Bethlehem. Remember? We bought bread there after 3 days without fresh food!
M: Of course – Bread-house: Bethlehem. So …. That’s the end of the story, you ankle-biters. So off you go and … do whatever it is children do - give us some rest.
X: No No No! WHAT ABOUT THE KING?
B: The King? What king? The star led us to a BABY. It stopped over the place where the baby boy was.
X: Baby? What baby? You told us you were going to find a KING
Y: Z and I had a bet. I said you’d never find a king. S/He said you would.
Z: So you did?
B: Well, as it turned out, the BABY was the KING – newly born. And the Shepherds had a fantastic story to tell us how THEY found out about the king. But perhaps Melchior will tell you all about that in a little while - after
we’ve caught up on some sleep.
Z: So I won my bet!
M: Yes. I suppose you did. And what a king!
X: So what happened to your GIFTS? You said you were taking GIFTS?
C: [ he’s forgotten] Oh yes! Ah. Balthazar – YOU tell them, while I take a sip of my chai.
B: Err… ah. Well, we DID purchase gifts for him. [BUCK-PASSING] – Melchior. Can you remember what they were?
M: Of course! From some pirates! Gold, frankincense, and myrrh – and we gave them to him – well, to his parents – on his behalf.
Y: Where they nice?
M: What, the Pirates? Well – yes and no.
Y: No, not the PIRATES! … the PARENTS!
M: Oh, the parents!!!. Can’t rightly remember. Remember the parents, Caspar?
C: Certainly do, now I come to think about it. And they were very special people. I doubt I’ll ever forget them. What say you, Balthazar, my old friend?
B: What’s that? Ah… Oh. I concur, my good Caspar. Oh, this has been a very tiring Holiday! Fatima – when will you get these children back to school so we can have a wee rest?
Z: Did you have any BATTLES?
M: We had our moments. King Herod was the worst!
B: Oh Herod, yes, that’s right. How could I have forgotten!? Definitely, without a shred of a doubt. Herod. All Bad.
C: Of course yes – I was forgetting…HEROD! Now there’s an evil man!
Y: Did you FIGHT him?
C and B [ look at each other]: Did we?
M [exasperated]: In the end we didn’t have to. But we were glad we had our DAGGERS on board! We all had a dream, remember?
C: That’s right - we all had the same dream!
B: All of us.
M: We were warned not to go back to Herod after seeing the baby king.
X: We haven’t seen his star for a long time now.
Y: No, it’s gone.
Z: I wonder if the baby king’s all right?
XYZ: CAN WE HAVE OUR PRESENTS NOW, UNCLE CASPAR!!!
C: Well come on then – we’ll show you all our treasures. Melchior – take them through to the courtyard
M: Oh! That’s just SO not fair! Just cos I’m the youngest! All right then. Come on, kids – this way [all exit]
© Peter & Mary Minson 2008
All rights reserved
This play may be performed free of charge, on the condition that copies are not sold for profit in any medium, nor any entrance fee charged. In exchange for free performance, the authors would appreciate being notified of when and for what purpose the play is performed.