Check Please

By Scott Phillips

Summary

Two couples dining at a restaurant illustrate the acceptance of the free gift of God’s grace.

Characters

MARK: 
LINDA: 
CHUCK: 
APRIL: 
Waiter
Script
(Setting: Restaurant set with two tables, four chairs. MARK and LINDA sit at a restaurant dinner table, just finishing their meals. CHUCK sits at table on the other side of the room, with an empty setting across from him. APRIL passes by on her way back to her table from the restroom and notices MARK and LINDA.)
APRIL: Oh, hey, look who it is! Hi MARK , LINDA..
LINDA: Oh, hi! Funny seeing you here.
MARK: (looking around for him) Hey APRIL:. Is CHUCK here, too?
APRIL: Yeah, we’re sitting right over there.
(APRIL points over to her table and waves for CHUCK to come over to them. CHUCK gets up from his seat and comes over to them.)
APRIL: It’s good to see you out having a good time.
LINDA: I know, it’s been so hectic lately. We needed a nice night out.
CHUCK: (shows up at their table.) Hey there, what’s up, guys?
LINDA: Hi CHUCK:!
MARK: (they do a guy ritualistic handshake) Hey man, how’s it goin?
CHUCK: (putting his arm around APRIL: ) Pretty good, pretty good. Can’t complain.
LINDA: Hey, maybe you two can help settle an argument.
APRIL: Sure, we can try.
LINDA: Did you watch American Idol?
APRIL: Of course. Didn’t miss it!
LINDA: OK, so who should have been the real winner: Clay, or Ruben.
(CHUCK and APRIL respond simultaneously:)
CHUCK: : “Ruben!” / APRIL: : “Clay!”
(MARK and LINDA simultaneously:)
MARK: /LINDA: : “Thank you!”
(CHUCK and MARK shake hands and pound fists. The women shrug and roll their eyes in disappointment.)
MARK: That’s what I’m talkin’ about!
CHUCK: Ruben was the man!
APRIL: Well, we better go before this gets too heated.
LINDA: Ok, we’ll see you two at church tomorrow.
CHUCK: Ok, goodnight guys.
MARK: See you tomorrow.
(MARK and LINDA continue arguing (but soften their voices to only be heard quietly) as CHUCK and APRIL make their way back to their table and sit down. The waiter brings the check to CHUCK and APRIL . This waiter is very excited, positive and full of energy.)
WAITER: So, what’dya think, folks? Did you save room for dessert?
APRIL: Oh, gosh, no. I couldn’t eat another bite.
WAITER: Are you sure? Not even a Triple Chocolate Fudge Mountain Sundae, or a Fresh Apple Crisp a la mode?
CHUCK: (puts his hand up to stop the waiter’s list) We’re fine. Just the check please.
WAITER: Ok, super! I’ll get it for you.
(The waiter springs away. CHUCK takes the check and begins doing the math.)
APRIL: It was nice seeing MARK and LINDA .
CHUCK: (consumed with math, pulling out his wallet) Yeah, I like them.
APRIL: It’s been so hard on them lately, with things being slow at their business.
CHUCK: Yep, times are tough now for everybody.
APRIL: Yeah, but to quit your jobs and invest in starting your own business? That’s tough on a family.
CHUCK: Well, they’re doing well enough to go out to dinner.
APRIL: I know, but you have to go out once in a while. Last week LINDA was telling me they haven’t been out in months. It’s about time they got out and treated themselves.
(Meanwhile, MARK and LINDA hold hands across the table. They continue talking and smile at each other, enjoying their date.)
CHUCK: (finally done with the math, looks up and has a “light bulb” expression) You know, maybe we should cover their bill?
APRIL: Ya think?
CHUCK: Yeah, why not? We can afford it.
APRIL: Oh, that would be so nice. Yeah, we should! They would love that.
(CHUCK motions to the waiter (who is off stage). The waiter approaches their table hurriedly.)
WAITER Ok, you all set?
CHUCK: Yes. But I’d like to pick up my friend’s tab over there.
(CHUCK points over to MARK and LINDA’s table. The waiter glances.)
WAITER (surprised) Wow, the big spender this evening. Alright!
CHUCK: They’re not having dessert, are they?
APRIL: (dissapproving) CHUCK: !
CHUCK: (shrugs his shoulders) Well, I’m just asking!
WAITER Actually, no, they turned down the White Chocolate Raspberry Cheesecake and the Creamy Coffee Tiramisu.
CHUCK: OK, but, uh—don’t tell them until we leave, ok? I don’t want any argument about it. Kind of a surprise, you know?
WAITER (reaching into his apron for the bill) No problem, sir. Here’s their check. (hands the check to CHUCK)
CHUCK: Thanks, and you’ll be getting a nice tip out of this, too, don’t worry.
WAITER Thank you, sir! It was a pleasure serving you tonight!
(CHUCK takes a wad of money out his wallet, counts out some, and hands it all to the waiter.)
WAITER Thanks a bunch. Now you all have a terrific night!
APRIL: Thanks, you, too.
CHUCK: You, too, man.
(The waiter bounces off. APRIL and CHUCK get up from the table. They put their arms around each other and exit.)
APRIL: Boy, they will be so surprised.
(MARK motions to the waiter with the international “check please” signal. The waiter comes over to them)
MARK: We’re ready for the check now.
WAITER (beaming with pride as he gets to deliver the news) Actually, sir, it’s been taken care of.
MARK: What’s this?
WAITER You’re bill, sir, it’s been paid.
LINDA: What? But how could - oh.
MARK: That sneaky little....
LINDA: Well, that was so nice of them!
MARK: (pulling out his wallet with disgust) Well, let me at least give you a tip.
WAITER (puts his hand up, reluctantly) You don’t have to do that, sir. He took care of the tip, too.
MARK: What?
WAITER You two have a nice evening, now. Buh-bye. (Exits) (hits himself in the head) Man, I should’ve let him tip me!
MARK: (not sure if he’s happy or offended) Well, I can’t believe that!
LINDA: We’ll have to write them a thank you card.
MARK: Forget that, I’m gonna pay him back tomorrow.
LINDA: Don’t you think that would be kind of rude?
MARK: I can’t just let him pay for us like that.
LINDA: Why not?
MARK: (getting angry) What, does he think I can’t afford to pay for my own meal? I mean, we came here, it’s not like I didn’t bring money!
LINDA: They were just being nice. They’re our friends.
MARK: Well, I don’t know if I’m real comfortable with it. Let’s invite them out to dinner next week, and we’ll pay.
LINDA: MARK, that’s not why they did it. You’re getting all prideful. They’re just being generous.
MARK: (getting up from the table) Yeah, well what goes around, comes around, so I’m gonna pay him back.
LINDA: (also getting up) Fine, do whatever you want.
(They begin to leave the restaurant. MARK takes some money out and puts it on the table for a tip, trying to hide the fact from LINDA as she looks through her purse. They exit. The waiter approaches the table and begins cleaning up. He sees the money on the table.)
WAITER (shaking his head) Some people just can’t accept a free gift. (Counts the money, shakes his head) Man, and a cheap tipper, too! (Puts the money in his pocket, grabs the dishes and leaves.)
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Copyright Scott Phillips, all rights reserved.
This script may be used without royalty payment, provided no charge is made for entrance to the performance. In return for free use, the author would like to be told of any performance. He may be emailed at scottphillips68@hotmail.com