Is that your final answer?

By Denise Peterson

Summary

A game show featuring the devil as "Regis" from the TV game show "Who wants to be a Millionaire". The man on the game show trades away everything really important in his life for all the things he thinks are important.

Characters

Six persons on stage in business suits, ready for the 'fast finger' round.
Game show host

Script

(Devil enters and sits in chair, also dressed in suit. (Horns optional))

Devil: Welcome to all our guests and to the six contestants, our fast finger question is: put the following things in order of importance:

wife
church
God
work
money
children
(Pause for contestants to answer)

Devil: The winner is Mr. Jones, and the correct order is:

money
work
family
kids
church
God
Welcome Mr. Jones, please tell us something about yourself.

Mr. Jones: Well, I'm the CEO of a major software company and looking for more.

Devil: Well, we may just make you a millionaire today.

Mr. Jones: I hope so.

Devil: Are you ready for your first question?

Mr. Jones: Yes

Devil: Ok, here we go. For $500, will you miss a birthday party for your child to finish a business call?

Mr. Jones: This one is easy, yes, the call is very important.

Devil: Is that your final answer?

Mr. Jones: Yes.

Devil: That is correct, you just won $500. Now for your next question, for $1,000, would you miss your only daughter's ballet recital for a business dinner with a client?

Mr. Jones: This one's a little harder; I think I'll have to say yes.

Devil: Is that your final answer?

Mr. Jones: Yes, I'll have to say I would.

Devil: That is the correct answer. Now your next question, for $2,000, would you miss your son's soccer tournament for an out of town conference?

Mr. Jones: These questions only get harder. Can I use a lifeline?

Devil: Yes, you have the following excuses:
I need to be there to sell my products.
It is a good networking opportunity.
The company is just starting out; there is no one else to go.
Daddy will make it up to you next weekend.

Mr. Jones: I think I'll go with number one.

Devil: That changes the question to: Would you miss your son's soccer tournament, if you needed to be at an out of town conference to sell your product?

Mr. Jones: Well, with the new change, I'd have to say yes.

Devil: Is that your final answer?

Mr. Jones: yes

Devil: That is correct. Congratulations, you now have $2,000.

Mr. Jones: Thank you, I couldn't have done that one without the lifeline.

Devil: Very good then, are you ready for the $3,000 question?

Mr. Jones: Yes, I am.

Devil: Ok, here we go. Your wife has scheduled a marriage counseling session on a Saturday. Would you miss the session to play golf with a prospective client?

Mr. Jones: This one I know, I'd play golf even if there were no client.

Devil: Is that your final answer?

Mr. Jones: Yes, I'm sure I'd play golf over anything else, especially a counseling session.

Devil: Yes, that is the correct answer. You have just won $3,000.

Mr. Jones: This is great.

Devil: Are you ready for the $4,000 question?

Mr. Jones: Bring it on, I feel lucky today.

Devil: Ok, would you blow off a romantic weekend with your wife, to wine and dine a prospective client?

Mr. Jones: Well, I don't know.

Devil: Take your time, and give it some thought.

Mr. Jones: Yes, I think I would.

Devil: Is that your final answer?

Mr. Jones: Yes, I'd stay with the client.

Devil: That is correct, you're really cookin' now. Are you ready for the $7,000 question?

Mr. Jones: I'm ready sir.

Devil: Ok then, would you skip your tenth anniversary dinner with your wife to close an important deal?

Mr. Jones: Wow, this one's hard, too. Can I get another lifeline?

Devil: Yes, you may choose from the following excuses:
I lost track of time.
I thought it was tomorrow.
This will make us lots of money, and then I can buy you things.
I just want to be a success for you.

Mr. Jones: I'll take number three.

Devil: Then the question changes to: Would you miss the tenth anniversary dinner with your wife to close an important deal, make lots of money, and buy things for her?

Mr. Jones: Well, with the changes, I'd have to say yes.

Devil:  Is that your final answer?

Mr. Jones: Yes, I'd miss the dinner  to make more money.

Devil: That is the correct answer. You have just won, $7,000. Are you ready to go for $10,000?

Mr. Jones: Yes.

Devil:  The question is: Would you divorce your wife of twenty years to marry a show bride, half your age if it impresses your clients?

Mr. Jones: Well, (hesitates), if it impresses my clients, I guess.

Devil:  Is that your final answer; take your time. We have as much time as you need to answer the question.

Mr. Jones: I guess.

Devil: Are you absolutely sure?

Mr. Jones: Yes, I'd do that.

Devil: That is the correct answer.

Mr. Jones: Yea, I can't believe this; I'm doing great at this, not all of these questions are hard.

Devil:  Before we go on the $25,000 question, we'll pause for this commercial break.

(Show commercial, during which, make-up is applied to devil, and water is brought to Mr. Jones).

 We're back with Mr. Jones who, up to this point has won $10,000 in his pursuit of worldly wealth and power. Mr. Jones are you ready for the $25,000 question?

Mr. Jones: Yes! I'm ready let's have it!

Devil: For $25,000 and the opportunity to go forward; the question is: Would you, skip your parent's 50th wedding anniversary celebration to close a merger deal?

Mr. Jones: This one is too difficult, can I still use a lifeline?

Devil: Yes, you may choose from the following excuses.
It's not like I missed the last one.
I wanted to make my Dad proud.
Mom will understand it's business.
It's just one party, there will be others.

Mr. Jones: Well, with those choices, I'll go with number two.

Devil: Then the question changes to: Would you miss your parent's 50th wedding anniversary party, to close a merger deal in order to make your Dad proud?

Mr. Jones: Yes, in that case I think I would do that.

Devil: Is that your final answer?

Mr. Jones: Yes, to make my dad proud, I'd do it.

Devil: That is the correct answer; you have just won $25,000. Are you ready to make the big jump, to go on to the $500,000 question?

Mr. Jones: Yes, I think I can do this. I'll go on to the next question.

Devil: Ok then, for half a million, would you choose not pick up your children for a scheduled visitation weekend, in order to take your new show wife, and the man you want to be your new president and his show wife on a weekend cruise?

Mr. Jones: Wow this one is almost too difficult to answer. Do I still have a lifeline left?

Devil: Yes you have one more.

Mr. Jones: I'll take the lifeline now.

Devil: Ok, you may pick from the following excuses.
The kids will understand.
They need to spend time with their mother at this age.
I'll make it up to them next time; buy them something nice from our trip.
I need a new president desperately.

Mr. Jones: Wow, with those choices, I'll take number four.

Devil: Well, then the question changes to: Would you choose not pick up the kids for a scheduled visitation week end in order to take your new show wife, and the man you want to be your new president along with his show wife on a weekend cruise, if you needed a new president desperately.

Mr. Jones: Well, I still don't know.

Devil: Take your time; we have plenty of that to go around.

Mr. Jones: Yes, I'll take the cruise, if I need the president desperately.

Devil: That is the correct answer, you have just won $500,000, half a million dollars. Are you sure that you want to go on to the next question, for one million dollars?? For all the money, do you want the question?

Mr. Jones: Yes, I want the million dollars, what's the question?

Devil: Are you sure?

Mr. Jones: Yes, I want the question.

Devil: For one million dollars, would you sell your soul to the devil and have all the worldly power you desire?

Mr. Jones: Well, I don't know if I'd go that far.

Devil: For all the worldly power you desire.

Mr. Jones: Do I have any lifelines left?

Devil: No, you're out of excuses, this one is your decision and yours alone.

Mr. Jones: I just don't know.

Devil: You must make up your mind, you have nothing else; you have blown off your children, divorced your wife (the one that loved you for you) and alienated your entire family. There is nothing left for you to do but this, what will your final answer be?

(Fade to black.)

................................................

Copyright Denise Peterson, all rights reserved. The play may be performed free of charge, on condition that no charge is made for admission. In return, the author would appreciate being notified of any performance. She may be contacted at dpeters@guerra.com