Get Wise!

By John McNeil

Summary

None of the characters act too wisely in this drama, in which events turn full circle.

 

Scripture

Proverbs 3:13-18

 

Characters:

George Needham
Kelly Needham (his daughter)
Mr Jenkins (Kelly's form teacher)
Ms Hawkey (Chairperson of school board, and a company director)

 

Script

(Scene: A desk in mid-stage, with one chair. Father is standing beside the desk, picking through daughter's schoolbooks.)

Father:
English...not done. Maths......missing. Science......goodness knows. (Calls) Kelly! Kelly! Turn that computer off this instance and come here!

Kelly:
(voice off) Hold on, Dad, I've nearly got the last level of Myst cracked.

Father:
Something's been missed alright, but it's not that game. If you're not here in three, you'll be missing some pocket money as well. One....

Kelly:
(with very bad grace) Oh, all right. I'm coming.

Father:
... two...

Kelly:
I said I'm coming, didn't I. (Enters in a rush) Now what's the matter?

Father:
What's the matter? (Grabs Kelly and pushes her into the seat.) This is the matter! See these?

Kelly:
Yes!?

Father:
Well, it's obviously the first time in a week. Your form teacher, Mr Jenkins, called today. You have assignments overdue in every subject.

Kelly:
Not every subject. I handed in my technology project a day early.

Father:
That .... computer! I'm sorry for the day I let you twist my arm to buy it. You do nothing with it but play games and surf the Internet.

Kelly:
But I'm learning all sorts of useful stuff through the Net.

Father:
The evidence (picks up books, thumps them down) says otherwise, miss. You'd better get wise, kiddo, and start applying yourself, because if you don't life is not going to go well with you. And just to help you concentrate, I'm pulling the plug on our Internet account, and confiscating the modem ... if I can figure out how to unplug the thing! Now get your nose into those books and start catching up (Exits)

Kelly:
But Dad, I need the Internet to do my homework. (Flings down book and exits crying.)

(Enter Teacher, Mr Jenkins, carrying several books. Picks up Kerry's books, adds them to his pile. Sits at the desk and starts marking.)

Jenkins:
Kelly Needham. Only two weeks late. I don't understand it. She can do good work when she applies herself. But lately she's been in a dream world. Not matter how often I chew her ear I can't seem to get through. Perhaps that talk I had with her father will do some good.

(Enter Ms Hawkey, Chairperson of school board.)

Hawkey:
Ah, Mr Jenkins, glad I caught you. Do you have a moment.

Jenkins:
Oh hello, Ms Hawkey. (Starts to stand.)

Hawkey:
No, don't stand on my account. I'll only be a moment. I'm just off to a meeting of the school board.

Jenkins:
(Wary) Oh?

Hawkey:
You are no doubt aware that we are in the process of reviewing staff contracts and performance.

Jenkins:
Of course. But should we be talking about that in this way. I certainly don't want people to think I'm lobbying the chairperson.

Hawkey:
That's not quite how I see it, Mr Jenkins. The other way around, if anything.

Jenkins:
Oh?

Hawkey:
I'm sure you are aware of our school's mission statement, and our desire to foster harmonious relationships at all levels... from board and principal through to staff and students.

Jenkins:
I should be. I helped draft the document.

Hawkey:
Quite. A little ironic, don't you think? Perhaps even protesting a little too much.

Jenkins:
What do you mean?

Hawkey:
There are many who would agree that the harmony of the school is not what it should be. And unfortunately, the focus of that concern does not sit too far from you, Mr Jenkins.

Jenkins:
What! If you have any complaints about the quality of my teaching, why have I not been told before?

Hawkey:
Some would say you are not an easy man to tell anything personal to, Mr Jenkins. And that is why I prefer to have a word in quiet with you, before tonight's board meeting. We find ourselves in a difficult position. I acknowledge that when things are going well, you are a good teacher. But too often lately things have not been going well, and the school is definitely out of harmony.

Jenkins:
(Starts to rise) This is victimisation and scandalmongering! I will....

Hawkey:
Sit down, Mr Jenkins and if you are wise you will listen to a quiet word of advice. I think you need a change of scene.... No, please hear me out. I am aware of certain personal matters that have got on top of you, and I think you need a change of scenery. If you should choose to seek a new establishment, I feel sure your application would be accompanied by a good reference as to your skills. Should I say, better than might be the case if the board should find not see fit to renew your contract.

Jenkins:
This is blackmail. You have no authority to come here like this. I will not submit...

Hawkey:
Before you make any rash statements, Mr Jenkins, take a few minutes to think your position through carefully. I am just off to the staffroom to get a quick bite to eat before the meeting. I'll pop my head in on my way back, in the hope I can convey to the other members your desire to promote the interests of the school in all appropriate ways. (Exits)

Jenkins:
(Picks up books.) I will not take this lying down, Ms chair-mighty-person. I have my own friends on your precious board. (exits).

(Ms Hawkey re-enters. Sits at desk and starts writing. Enter Mr Needham.)

Needham:
You wanted to see me, Ms Hawkey?

Hawkey:
Yes, George. (She picks up a piece of paper.) A certain piece of paper has come into my hands... it appears to be a memorandum, although it is somewhat unclear from who or to whom.

Needham:
A memorandum!?

Hawkey:
Yes. It purports to convey information concerning certain aspects of the financial affairs of this company.

Needham:
Oh!?

Hawkey:
I don't know who the author is of this memorandum, and it might not be necessary for me to inquire too closely. However, it may be that in your position as accounts clerk you are able to convey a friendly word to the instigator.

Needham:
If I knew what the paper contained....

Hawkey:
I suspect that you are more than familiar with the contents. And I have to say that while the figures outlined here are a grave misrepresentation of the true state of our trust accounts, if they should leak to our competitors, the result could be extremely damaging. To put it bluntly, I do not want to see our position ruined by an ... unfounded... rumour. If anyone has acted ... unwisely... at either management or staff level, it would be better to correct misunderstandings at this stage. If I make myself clear.

Needham:
(Imitating her style) I'm sure that if my request for promotion were given better consideration these misunderstandings might be quickly corrected.

Hawkey:
Promotion! You... (collects herself) Mr Needham, you obviously do not appreciate that your position is in fact on the verge of becoming redundant. Technology has overtaken you. Despite your emphatic resistance to learning to use a computer, we have kept you on out of respect for your long service. (Forces herself to soften.) I am offering you a chance, Mr Needham. Be wise. Learn to use a computer, and you may yet have a job. And I will dispose of this paper to save it causing anyone further embarrassment. Good day. (Both exit.)

(Needham returns, carrying a computer, which he puts down on the desk. He jabs away at the keyboard, and thumps the mouse.)

Needham:
RAM, CD-ROMs, Virtual Memory, HTML!! It's no good. I just don't understand this thing. How am I supposed to learn.... Simple enough a child of 10 can use it, they say. I give up. (Shakes his head in resignation. Calls out.) Kelly! Kelly!

Kelly: (Enters)
Yes, Dad?

Needham:
Will you please come and show me how to use this confounded machine!

 

© John McNeil 1998

All rights reserved
This play may be performed free of charge, on the condition that copies are not sold for profit in any medium, nor any entrance fee charged.
In exchange for free performance, the author would appreciate being notified of when and for what purpose the play is performed.
He may be contacted at: soul.communication@outlook.com
Or at: 36B Stourbridge St, Christchurch 2, New Zealand.