Gone Fishin'

By Paul E. Russell

Summary

A satirical look ate the parting at the red sea from the perspective of two jelly fish, Barry & Larry.

Scripture

Exodus 14: 15-31

Characters

Barry & Larry the Jelly Fish.

Script

(Two people enter and wander around. One stops and stares out, looking quite shocked.)

Barry: Wow, come look at this Larry, come check this out.

Larry: I've seen it before. It's been there for months.

Barry: You mean this giant chasm of air. I don't think so.

Larry: Are you sure?

Barry: Larry, don't you think I would have noticed a giant vortex of death and column of air racing through the ocean?

Larry: I guess so, dare you to swim into it.

Barry: Um, no, I don't think so.

Larry: Go on!

Barry: Larry it's air. You know what happened to Tony, no water no way to breathe.

Larry: What are you, a jellyfish?

Barry: Well yes, actually I am, and so are you.

Larry: Oh yeah, that's right. Barry, it can't be air. Air is always up and that is more, you know, in a horizontal direction.

Barry: You mean left.

Larry: Yeah that's it, left.

Barry: If it isn't air, then how come all those two leggers are walking through it? Larry: And people say I'm dim. They're not two leggers - we're at the bottom of the ocean.

Barry: Larry, they have two legs and they're walking. What would you call them?

Larry: Nah, it's just a normal school.

Barry: A school? What school do you know that has legs?

Larry: Oh yeah, I see them . . . legs . . well what do you know . . they must be crabs.

Barry: Crabs?

Larry: Yes Barry, crabs have legs. I don't know, it's like talking to a piece of drift wood sometimes, having a conversation with you.

Barry: Larry, don't crabs have eight legs?

Larry: Ten, if you count their nippers.

Barry: No, eight is counting their nippers.

Larry: Is that counting those silly little flipper things on their backs?

Barry: Can you see any little flipper things on their backs?

Larry: Well no, but crabs are always great at camouflage.

Barry: Do they look camouflaged to you?

Larry: No, but that one is wearing red.

Barry: Red? So what?

Larry: Crabs are red. Barry: Only when they are cooked.

Larry: Maybe they are cooked.

Barry: Larry, you are a jellyfish. When have you ever seen a cooked crab?

Larry: Well never, but maybe that's why they are so hard to recognise.

Barry: Look, Larry, that one has a foot.

Larry: Oh yeah, sea slugs

Barry: What?

Larry: Seriously, it's like chatting with a barnacle. Sea slugs, they must be sea slugs. They have a foot.

Barry: How many sea slugs do you know that wear sandals?

Larry: Well none, sea slugs are very isolated creatures and don't have very many friends.

Barry: How many sea slugs have you seen that have knees and can breathe in air?

Larry: Maybe they're holding their breath.

Barry: Oh, they're gone. I guess we will never know what they were for sure.

Larry: (about to talk but freezes) B-B-B-Barry…

Barry: Look, I truly thought they were two leggers, but I may have been wrong.

Larry: B-B-BARRY LOOK!!

Barry: What? Oh, look at that, thousands more of them. Look Larry, those ones have four legs, look how fast they are going.

Larry: Ooh-wow.

Barry: Do you still think they are holding their breath?

Larry: Whales breathe air and swim on the bottom of the ocean floor.

Barry: They're not whales, Larry.

Larry: I know, interesting fact though.

Barry: More interesting though is why are these two leggers all dressed the same?

Larry: Ooh, look they have pointy things. Do you think they are friendly?

Barry: Larry, when have you ever known things with pointy things to be friendly?

Larry: Oh yeah (rubs his bottom). Hey Barry, do you think they know that the air is disappearing?

Barry: I don't think so.

Larry: That shiny stuff looks pretty hard to swim in.

Barry: I told you they were two leggers. Look how bad they are at swimming

Larry: Oh well, fun's over. (Larry walks away and calls from off stage)

Larry: Hey Barry, come check this out this shell. Looks exactly like your mother in-law. Barry: Larry! What are you doing, put that down. Hello mum.

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This is a Paul E. Russell script. Please notify him by email if you choose to produce this skit. His address is a_russell03@hotmail.com . The writer would also appreciate any feedback and photographs of the production.